Sleepless nights – 10 survival tips

One of the main things I learned from motherhood (next to the great immeasurable deal of patience a female human being is capable of) is the importance of sleep.
I used to need a few hours a night to charge my batteries : never been an issue before.
Now like all of us parents, I consider it a sumptuous luxury and like a lot of us I go to bed with the secret fear of hearing a cry in the middle of my dream (Was it Emma? Oh, God, it was my own breathing).
So I don’t pretend helping you finding any solution to your child’s sleep issues. If only I had one… let’s say I wouldn’t be very convincing talking about sleepless nights, anyway.

But here are some tips I have been cogitating about this night (got the picture?).

    1. Don’t tell your boss. Because he doesn’t care. And in a competitive environment, he will only wonder whether (i) you will be able to fulfill your function in the coming months  or (ii) it wouldn’t be the perfect argument not to promote you/grant you a bonus this year. So hold back your frustration and just concentrate to get this damn pivot table right.
    2. Tell your friends. So they understand why you have disappeared/are (a bit) ill-tempered/forgot their birthday.
      Questions
    3. Consider swapping your actual bed… for a huge one. I’d say 2m wide at least.Family bed
      Except of course if you manage the 5-10-15 minutes method-and-most-importantly-don’t-take-him-out-of-his-bed (I would pay my pediatrician to spend a night at my place, damn it).
    4. Let your child stay at your parents. A night or two, the time you need to recover (thanks, Mummy).
    5. Involve your partner. And buy earplugs. He’ll manage.
      Boules quies
    6. Avoid the parents who “have been there”, especially those who tell you their 3 children haven’t slept through until they were 4 like it was no big deal. Court instead the happy-almost-feeling-guilty ones who show so much understanding for you living a nightmare they have no idea of.
    7. Dress up. Use the few energy you have left in the evening to carefully choose your outfit for the next day. Because you will be exhausted in the morning (you know you will) and have no time for it. Let people focus on your look instead of the dark rings under your eyes.
      Nice look
    8. Take a power nap. It shouldn’t be more than 20/30 minutes in the early afternoon. If your office doesn’t provide any nap room (is it an urban legend?), you may test the Pauz nap bar which recently opened on the rue Belliard.
    9. Ignore the dark thoughts.
      Dark thoughts
      It took me some time to get to this one, but it is the most important tip of all. Don’t drop any project (pause it at the most), don’t take your disillusions seriously, and if you really want to hit your husband (sic), just do it (a little) and laugh about it. The lack of rest can make you loath the things/persons you love most. It can make you see the smallest of your activities as an unreachable goal. If this feeling is new, store it in a drawer and have a new look at it after a good night sleep (see point 4.). And understand that those quarrels with your husband won’t mean anything, then.
    10. Go to the spa. I had my first professional massage last year (I know). My adorable husband rightly found it was time for me to relax in company of my sister, so he offered us a massage at Spasiba. I have always been a little bit sceptical about wellness activities. Well that was before. Now I get the feeling it is time for me to test the Deep Nature Spa on the Up tower
      Girls, we deserve it.

photo credit: CarbonNYC [in SF!] via photopin cc

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